hey, bandwagon, wait for me!

i've begun to feel aimless and a bit resentful of other more mission-oriented bloggers, so i'm instituting a weekly column. welcome to the first installment of sunday best-of blogging!

album i can't stop climbing up on top of kitchen chairs to dance to: the bravery - the bravery

best double-take: in response to the following line off of death cab for cutie's new album, plans: "love is watching someone die--so who's gonna watch you die?" i was hoping to die alone without anyone even knowing; does that mean i can't bear to be loved? ben gibbard says yes. but ben is, historically, a little mopey.

best new television program: hgtv's handmade modern with todd oldham. oh, such happy-making! i'm not, as a rule, a sucker for d.i.y. shows, but i've been a sucker for todd oldham all my life, and he has great tips for people who know a lot about contact paper and nothing about power tools. he also shares my passion for too-bright freeze-pop color palettes and, apparently, laboratory glassware. i'm thinking about taping the shows and putting them away for the day when i (hopefully) have a place of my own that i can decorate without having to worry about cranky, tasteless roommates or volatile, undisciplined, woodwork-munching parrots.

best act of youthful rebellion: on my way home from work i was nearly knocked over by a boy, maybe seven or eight years old, lurching awkwardly yet rapidly down the sidewalk in sweatpants, an x-men t-shirt and a pair of black open-toed platform high heels. he was shouting to a woman across the street, "hey mom, wait up! wait for me! mom! mommy! don't leave me, i love you!" the woman was walking briskly in the opposite direction with her eyes glued firmly to her feet.

best your-mama joke: "what are you eating?"
"your mama."
"seriously."
"seriously? i ate so much of your mama last night that i'm gonna be full for days, so if you want the rest of this eggplant it's yours."

best example of prison reform at work: i dosed a cat named sebastian this week with I-131 to treat his hyperthyroidism, and he's going to be living in my ward until he's no longer radioactive. when sebastian was admitted on monday he was pure evil. he lunged at me through his cage door from across the room, and during his physical exam he chased a doctor up onto a counter. he was still evil on wednesday and wanted very much to tear out a sizable portion of my calf every time i walked in front of his cage, but yesterday he let me reach right inside it to give him his breakfast without even standing up, and he only growled when i made eye contact. prolonged eye contact still drives him to shoot his angry kitty leg through the grating to scratch out my heart, but undeniable progress is being made. he'll love me in a week and a half, i'm sure of it.

best cartoon by an english madman: 10 different types of soup