i found jesus! and a clam!

who knew the second
coming would involve so much
neoprene? not me.



no, i've never found him, exactly. we're like two strangers who once kissed passionately and drunkenly for fifteen regretful minutes at a party. we see each other there on opposite sides of the canned goods aisle, but acknowledging recognition is strictly verboten. i've run into him on occasion, but it's always been awkward, and we're both relieved to go our separate ways without incident.

this lovely gentleman met up with him, though, and it was one of the top stories on this evening's fox 25 news. you can read all about it here. for those of you who favor abridgments, the wee savior was stolen from a nativity. the town offered a $1,000 reward for its return and then sent police divers on an hours-long recon mission. this chap, a former harbormaster, saw what he thought was a white swan (but was actually a trash bag) and followed it straight to the lord. hallelujah. by now jesus has been securely strapped and glued back into his hay, and all is right with the world.

oh, er, hrrm...wait a minute. scratch that last bit.